Around the Cauldron

Stuck in transition

I don’t remember the last time I went this long without blogging. A whole month! What have I been doing?! Not a lot…

I’ve been reluctant to join in this years The Pagan Experience. It’s harder to write when you don’t feel like you have anything to say, or feel as though your thoughts on the subject or topic of the week aren’t strong enough to come up with an entire post about.

Funnily enough, this month’s topic is on Transitioning, and I guess that’s what I’m experiencing at the moment. To be honest I feel more in limbo than in a transitional state, but sometimes they can be one and the same.

I’m between subjects at university. Not for much longer – Autumn semester begins on Monday, and Summer semester only finished last week (totally nailed the unit, I might add). I’m transitioning at work – final month or two on this project before being sent to one of the major projects the community doesn’t built in their area (that’s the world of construction, for you).

I’m finding that when you try to incorporate the academic world as part of your path, one or the other gets left astray and you become unbalanced. As much as I have loved every minute of Mangamai’bangawarra, going from learning of the (white-man allowed knowledge of) local Indigenous ways then transitioning back into a very British-focused path is enough to tip you off the boat: you’re not quite sure whether to swim to shore or wait for a life raft (oh so many things I could politically go on with there!).

Maybe I wasn’t on a boat – maybe I was walking through the forest and it started pouring, so I left the path I was on to find shelter, only to find myself lost when the rain cleared.

Either way, I’m back at that familiar stage that I visit every few years. The path before me is no longer the path I thought I’d be taking. Am I still walking the path in the forest? Am I still in the forest? I know I haven’t found a clearing, and it’s certainly not the haunted woods.

The message I’ve been receiving has been very strong – just pick up the damn phone, woman, and call me!

In the forest, I have phone reception. My phone is fully charged, and I know who to call. He won’t be able to tell me which path to take, but maybe he can point me in the right direction if I’m no where near where I’m supposed to be.

Herne’s amazing like that.

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