I feel like I’m coming full circle. Yule some years ago I attended a workshop with Michelle on connecting with the Tarot and wrote about it in ‘The Fool at Midwinter’. Here we are again, but thanks to COVID it’s through Facebook and I’m able to connect in my time, on the land I call home. And I did not expect the results that came.
As the Fool, or the Wanderer as it’s known within the Wildwood Tarot that I love and use, I took myself to a spot within the Wagga Wagga region that I hadn’t gone before. How better to take that first step out of the Cave than to visit somewhere completely new? How better to experience the beginning of a journey than to have a brand new experience?
I took myself to the Marrambidya Wetlands on Wiradjuri Country. Through the ‘audio tours’ along the walk I learnt about the Goanna Girl who helped create the Murrumbidgee River. I learnt about how the Healing Place was meant to be through the founding of a Scar Tree.
I Acknowledged Country once I got to the Healing Place, and sat and connected to the card. I was reminded of my community through the cockatoos flying overhead. I was reminded of my connection to Herne through the call of His bird. I heard what the Brown Treecreepers had to tell me about my journey of health and wellbeing.
Throughout my Wander, I felt that instant connection back to the land.
Last May I underwent a meditation led by my ClanMothers teacher (a Lenape and Cherokee leader) and laughed it off when I told him what I saw. In a world where everyone wants to have their spirit animal be a lion, or the bear, or these animals that scream strength and fierceness and determination… mine is one often hunted, but also native to Australia. He reminded me of the importance of the animal as it connects to the three sacred realms – of Land, of Sea, of Sky.
Leaving the Healing Place and making my way around the boundaries of the ponds, I saw my animal, always in pairs, as it has always shown itself to me. I felt memories come flooding back to me, of all my studies over the last 20 years, and so much I had forgotten. Or not forgotten, but put away on a shelf within my mind and glanced at but never really brought into life. I’ve been so focused on my physical health, developing my latest path of Dedication with Herne, I had put aside my Spiritual health on that shelf. I’ve been postponing my own spiritual learnings for job search, and mindful walks, but also mindful I haven’t felt comfortable to sit at just bang on the drum due micromanaging landlords and upsetting the neighbours.
There is so much more I could be doing, and I’ve been lazy. I had forgotten all these years of self-study, and self-progression, because I got comfortable learning with my Tribe and my Community. Because of COVID I had to stop going to the River, or going to the Reserves, or on excursions I’d normally take myself on to feel connected to the land. Instead I’ve been connecting to suburbia, losing a strong element of self.
This Wander reminded me of what I had lost, and what I can regain. I was reminded about how, despite not being born on Wiradjuri Country (and having a UK/European bloodline) that this land is my home. I knew I belonged here years before I moved here.
Drumming with my Clan a few nights earlier I received such powerful and comforting wisdom from Herne and Elen of the Ways. While Herne kept me under his wing, Elen reminded me of the pathways before me, how I had been sitting on the bench before the cross roads for long enough, that it was time to reconnect.
I left Marrambidya feeling drunk and high on the energy flowing through me. I felt feeling energized. I have an IDEA of the path that lies before me, and I’m incredibly excited at the journey before me.